Color Guard Questions
1. When did you start spinning?
in seventh grade in the '97-'98 season
2.What was the first guard/group you were in?
Dover Bulldogs.
3. How many years did you march?
Eight years.
4. What guard(s) did you march?
Dover Bulldogs, Fairfield Open Guard, San Jose Raiders World Guard, The Seattle Cascades Drum Corps.
5. What do you like better, winter guard, drum corps, or marching band?
Winter Guard, and by a fucking landslide.
6. Ever been to WGI?
Yeah, four times. My first time was in 2002, that was when the Independent World class colorguards were all phenomenal, yes even the freaky deaky dutch "Girls Gang" from the Netherlands. They were phenomenal to watch up close....it was like a freak show...but not the kind that Pride put on a few years later. i just remember that year blowing my mind more than any other year in colorguard.
7. Have you been in a guard that made WGI finals?
Sadly, only when i made it to the big guard did i ever make it to finals. That would have kicked so much ass if Fairfield would have made it that first year.
8. Best part about being in winter guard?
Oh man....as cheesy as it sounds it HAS to be the people you meet. It's the coolest feeling in the world being at a show when awards are over. i mean, you're standing on a floor bumping into people you know from all over the world because you met them at an audition months before..or met them at a party where you made out with them while taking jello shots...Winter guard is truly an amazing experience. -ALSO- rehearsals are fun as hell. **ALL** rehearsals are fun, i don't give a shit what anyone says...those were a blast. Bustin' on your blacks, standing in a formation...dancing..challenging yourself all day everyday to be better. It's truly exhilarating.
9. Worst part about being in winter guard?
When you're not as good as you should be. Damn that's the fucking worst...when you suck. Because you're never allowed to forget that *YOU* are the weak link in the equation to a gold medal. A lot of people can't handle that much pressure...Oh yeah....the money part blows balls too.
10. Best part about marching drum corps?
Ugh...getting skinny, and that's IT.
11. Worst part about marching drum corps?
Valerie worded it perfectly...and she didn't even march...how hilarious.
"I imagine its like paying for torture in the sun"
i mean...you end up getting the weirdest tan ever. you have to shower in front of like a hundred other chicks. You eat practically nothing. You wake up in the morning after maybe three hours of decent sleep and spin in the hot ass sun for around 12 hours, eight if you have a show..you eat a lame ass sandwich...pack up and get on a bus where you proceed to sit in your stinky seat and try to sleep while sitting up so that you can drive all night to the next state...Only to wake up with swollen ass feet and ankles and do it all over again the next day.
i say this but of course, a lot of people liked it. It was just not for me.
12. When did you age out/stop marching?
i stopped after 2005, i was 20 and thought i should have "grown up". Honestly, i still regret that.
13. Favorite show you were in?..
2002..Fairfield Open's "California" show. Is that lame? Whatever, it was my first Debbie and a total eye opening experience to a whole world that i never knew could exist.
14. Favorite show you were not in, but wish you could have been?
Hm.....this is practically impossible to decide.
My first love will forever be Blue Devils' "White Rabbit"
but then The San Jose Raiders had to go and do the Frida show.......
it's a toss up between the two.
15.Someone in guard you looked up to?
There are so many people that i looked up to..and for hella different reasons..Sometimes it was not that they were good at colorguard, it was just that they were really cool people and i looked up to them for that..or that they were so incredibly patient and nice. Or - they were just really hot....or most likely..they were both..hot and good.
Hmm....imma take a stab and name off like five.
Jason Flores *duh*
Valerie DeSoto
Robert Daze
Eddie Castro
Eric Aguilar
there are of course loads more.
16. Favorite equipment:
hm..sore subject, really. i was always a rifle girl..until they told me that because i didn't have a "dick"** between my legs i couldn't be seen spinning it. So i was placed on the sabre line my second year at Raiders..and then something incredibly strange happened...i LOVED spinning that sword. So, my favorite piece of equipment to spin is a sabre. But i like to watch rifles more.
** if any Raiders people are reading this i hope to god you caught that double entendre.
17. Where do you see the activity in 10 years?
Honestly, where it was ten years ago...just a lot cooler to look at.
18. What is the biggest lesson you have learned from being in guard?
That you can do and be anything in this world, so long as you are open to the change.
19. What guard that is no longer active would you love to see return?
OH! my heart aches to see The San Jose Raiders World guard of yesteryear..Also, because i'm a wispy and nostalgic kinda girl i'd LOVE to see The Blue Devils World guard take the floor again.
20. Do you think winter guard will ever get on T.V.
Nope. No one will get it. Nobody that isn't directly linked to the activity understands it. i find that in describing this activity people take an apologetic approach. "Yeah, i did that dancy thing a few years back...you know where they spin around flags...it's cooler than you think i swear". Even when you show them your highly coveted VHS copies of the legendary "Summertimez" show they laugh at the tights the boys are wearing and ignore the perfectly executed ripple work in the back corner. They have no clue that what is looking so effortlessly beautiful on the screen is the most strenuous and demanding activity out there. So for that reason, i almost don't want winter guard on the T.V. i don't want something that i love that much to be bastardized like that.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
i think it took me three hours to finish this list.
The Mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.
The Criteria: Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).
Why 1001 Days? Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as new year’s resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.
1. Read The Bible - i feel that as someone who has a lot of criticism regarding Christianity, i should at least be knowledgable about it. i found a nifty translation into American English, rather than Ye Olde British English. It's available online. It's here in case you're interested.
2. Read the complete works of Anne Rice, with the excpetion of her Jesus book that just came out with *she just found god* and maybe her erotic novels.. i got around three chapters in before i was horribly disturbed, granted i was 17 when i first tried reading it, we'll see....i've read 10 out of 20 so far.
3. Visit the greater part of western Europe, the places i consider "important"
i consider these countries "important":
Portugal, Spain, France, Ireland, The United Kingdom, The Netherlands, Germany, Switzerland, Italy, Austria, The Czech Republic, Poland, Sweden, Romania, Greece, and Romania..i'm going to count Russia as it's own separate trip, because well hell..you can't do the Motherland in a week. Out of those 16, i've been to six..so i've got quite a ways to go. i'm counting on going to three of those that i haven't been to yet this summer.
4. Go wine tasting in Napa. i am a complete and total lover of wine, i live about 40 minutes away from Napa..so why in the hell have i never gone? i need to get on top of this stat.
5. Visit the MoMA in New York.
6. Go to a football game. Yep, that's right. i've never been to one.
7. Learn to read music.
8. Go to a Lisa Williams show. i know it's completely ridiculous how much i love her. But i genuinely believe that she can see/talk to dead people. How fucking cool is that?
9. Take a painting class - i'm thinking that i will need to take a drawing class first. i'm not trying to be the ONE idiot in that class.
10. See it snow in live action. i've only ever seen snow after it's already fallen.
11. Learn French.
12. Learn how to cook bacon without making it too damn crispy. i ruin it EVERYTIME, even though i can cook just about anything in the world. Bacon is like my kryptonite.
13. See a Broadway production on actual Broadway.
14. Re-buy a Nintendo 64 and officially beat Banjo-Kazooie. i never defeated the damned witch, rescued the sister though.
15. Throw something at Akon. i'd like to see him try to toss me offstage. Fucker.
16. Listen to Li Young Lee read one of his poems with my own ears and with his own voice.
17. Memorize all of the United States and their respective capitals. Maybe i'll buy one of those pencils.
18. Force myself to like sushi. i fucking hate sushi, but it's so damned pretty to look at that i find myself so jealous when people are eating it. i like my teriyaki chicken just fine though; with a fork too please.
19. Take an advanced poetry writing class. i've taken two creative writing classes in the past, where the bulk of the stuff written was poetry. They were both pretty rudimentary though, and i didn't get the hang of poetry writing until the end of the second class.
20. See Hugh Grant in the flesh. For some odd reason i feel like if there were ever famous person that i would bump into, it would be him. i looked for him the whole time i was in London. He lives in Notting Hill, yes like the movie he was in, and i intend to stake the area out Jack McFarland style.
21. On that note - See every episode of Will & Grace.
22. Get accepted to CSUEB.
23. Perfect driving a manual car. i am FAR from it.
24. Learn how to change a tire.
25. Learn how to change the oil in my car.
26. Get better at Chess. i used to play a lot with my dad. But not so much in the past year, i need to fix that.
27. Watch all 100 of the Greatest Films of all time, according to this list. i figure AMC wouldn't lie.
28. Pay off my credit card debt. Ugh, don't remind me.
29. Take a flamenco dance class, or 20 of them.
30. Learn how to take decent photographs.. of the artst fartsy persuasion.
31. Babysit a child for 8 hours. Just to remind myself why i vowed never to spawn.
32. Learn to type without looking at the keyboard. i'm pretty close, except i always have a million typos.
33. Learn to play a song on the guitar.
34. See a live ballet performance by an excellent company.
35. Exercise at least three times a week.
36. Get a facial... the kind you pay for.
37. Go golfing.
38. Create a portrait of my dogs.
39. Participate in the Bay to Breakers. *May 17, 2009* Also, dress ridiculously.
40. Build a sandcastle - - but a good one, a really good one.
41. Stay off the computer after 8:00 p.m. for a week.
42. Improve upon my classical music knowledge - Chopin, Rachmaninov, Mozart, Beethoven, Liszt, Bach...etc. etc.
43. See Bjork in concert again, this time hoping she will be better.
44. Go ice skating in San Francisco. *goes until Jan. 4th*
45. Send in a secret to Postsecret.
46. Learn a card trick.
47. Pay for the person behind me in the drive through.
48. Keep a food diary for at least 2 weeks.
49. Begin a dream diary.
50. Meditate for at least 30 minutes nightly before bed for one week.
51. Make a soundtrack for my life.
52. Buy a new car.
53. Get a colon cleanse. It would just be too good of a story.
54. Complete another detox for 10 days.
55. Sing in every shower I take for a month.
56. Play WoW for an hour someday. i have to see what all the fuss is about.
57. Get a pretty ring, and wear it everyday for a month.
58. See the Aurora Borealis.
59. Take a multivitamin daily for a month.
60. Solve a Rubik's Cube.
61. Live to be 24.
62. Climb to the top of the Eiffel Tower, instead of paying the 5 Euros to take the elevator.
63. Change my hair drastically.
64. Read "Mein Kampf"
65. Drink no alcohol for a whole month.
66. Frame the various pieces of art i have put away.
67. Go to Las Vegas and actually have a good time. *i'm 0 for 3*
68. Get someone else to do the 101 Goals list.
69. Wake up right after the alarm goes off for a week.
70. Go and see an opera.
71. Buy a new cell phone.
72. Get a new tattoo.
73. Go laser tagging.
74. Go a day without speaking.
75. Start and finish Europe scrapbook from first trip.
76. Drink the 8 8 oz. glasses of water needed everyday for a month.
77. Visit my family in Missouri.
78. Ride on a train - not BART-
79. Re-learn how to fold paper cranes and hang 1000 of them from my ceiling.*tell me you remember that book*
80. Shoot a gun.
81. Get fingerprinted at District Office - something i was supposed to do forever ago.
82. Sponsor someone in a charity walk.
83. Spend a day in San Francisco alone.
84. Get a new lipstick color that suits me.
85. Go on a cruise.
86. Beautify my desk space at Armijo.
87. Plan my funeral.
88. Visit all of the States. i'm probably a little over halfway done, i'll have to consult my list.
89. Stretch daily.
90. Fix the purses that need fixen'. *sew handles/pockets, buff leather, etc.*
91. Go somewhere cool with my dad.
92. Identify 100 things that make me happy.
93. Clear out the garage, as most of the clutter belongs to me and my childhood.
94. Memorize five of Shakespeare's sonnets.
95. Get a 3.3 GPA.
96. Write a piece of fan mail.
97. Watch a live Cirque Du Soleil show.
98. Learn how to make Mama's spaghetti.
99. Build a fort out of chairs and sheets, spend an hour in it.
100. Complete one year of Project 365.
101. Donate $10 for each goal not reached.
Custom Countdowns & MySpace Layouts
The Criteria: Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).
Why 1001 Days? Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as new year’s resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.
1. Read The Bible - i feel that as someone who has a lot of criticism regarding Christianity, i should at least be knowledgable about it. i found a nifty translation into American English, rather than Ye Olde British English. It's available online. It's here in case you're interested.
2. Read the complete works of Anne Rice, with the excpetion of her Jesus book that just came out with *she just found god* and maybe her erotic novels.. i got around three chapters in before i was horribly disturbed, granted i was 17 when i first tried reading it, we'll see....i've read 10 out of 20 so far.
3. Visit the greater part of western Europe, the places i consider "important"
i consider these countries "important":
Portugal, Spain, France, Ireland, The United Kingdom, The Netherlands, Germany, Switzerland, Italy, Austria, The Czech Republic, Poland, Sweden, Romania, Greece, and Romania..i'm going to count Russia as it's own separate trip, because well hell..you can't do the Motherland in a week. Out of those 16, i've been to six..so i've got quite a ways to go. i'm counting on going to three of those that i haven't been to yet this summer.
4. Go wine tasting in Napa. i am a complete and total lover of wine, i live about 40 minutes away from Napa..so why in the hell have i never gone? i need to get on top of this stat.
5. Visit the MoMA in New York.
6. Go to a football game. Yep, that's right. i've never been to one.
7. Learn to read music.
8. Go to a Lisa Williams show. i know it's completely ridiculous how much i love her. But i genuinely believe that she can see/talk to dead people. How fucking cool is that?
9. Take a painting class - i'm thinking that i will need to take a drawing class first. i'm not trying to be the ONE idiot in that class.
10. See it snow in live action. i've only ever seen snow after it's already fallen.
11. Learn French.
12. Learn how to cook bacon without making it too damn crispy. i ruin it EVERYTIME, even though i can cook just about anything in the world. Bacon is like my kryptonite.
13. See a Broadway production on actual Broadway.
14. Re-buy a Nintendo 64 and officially beat Banjo-Kazooie. i never defeated the damned witch, rescued the sister though.
15. Throw something at Akon. i'd like to see him try to toss me offstage. Fucker.
16. Listen to Li Young Lee read one of his poems with my own ears and with his own voice.
17. Memorize all of the United States and their respective capitals. Maybe i'll buy one of those pencils.
18. Force myself to like sushi. i fucking hate sushi, but it's so damned pretty to look at that i find myself so jealous when people are eating it. i like my teriyaki chicken just fine though; with a fork too please.
19. Take an advanced poetry writing class. i've taken two creative writing classes in the past, where the bulk of the stuff written was poetry. They were both pretty rudimentary though, and i didn't get the hang of poetry writing until the end of the second class.
20. See Hugh Grant in the flesh. For some odd reason i feel like if there were ever famous person that i would bump into, it would be him. i looked for him the whole time i was in London. He lives in Notting Hill, yes like the movie he was in, and i intend to stake the area out Jack McFarland style.
21. On that note - See every episode of Will & Grace.
22. Get accepted to CSUEB.
23. Perfect driving a manual car. i am FAR from it.
24. Learn how to change a tire.
25. Learn how to change the oil in my car.
26. Get better at Chess. i used to play a lot with my dad. But not so much in the past year, i need to fix that.
27. Watch all 100 of the Greatest Films of all time, according to this list. i figure AMC wouldn't lie.
28. Pay off my credit card debt. Ugh, don't remind me.
29. Take a flamenco dance class, or 20 of them.
30. Learn how to take decent photographs.. of the artst fartsy persuasion.
31. Babysit a child for 8 hours. Just to remind myself why i vowed never to spawn.
32. Learn to type without looking at the keyboard. i'm pretty close, except i always have a million typos.
33. Learn to play a song on the guitar.
34. See a live ballet performance by an excellent company.
35. Exercise at least three times a week.
36. Get a facial... the kind you pay for.
37. Go golfing.
38. Create a portrait of my dogs.
39. Participate in the Bay to Breakers. *May 17, 2009* Also, dress ridiculously.
40. Build a sandcastle - - but a good one, a really good one.
41. Stay off the computer after 8:00 p.m. for a week.
42. Improve upon my classical music knowledge - Chopin, Rachmaninov, Mozart, Beethoven, Liszt, Bach...etc. etc.
43. See Bjork in concert again, this time hoping she will be better.
44. Go ice skating in San Francisco. *goes until Jan. 4th*
45. Send in a secret to Postsecret.
46. Learn a card trick.
47. Pay for the person behind me in the drive through.
48. Keep a food diary for at least 2 weeks.
49. Begin a dream diary.
50. Meditate for at least 30 minutes nightly before bed for one week.
51. Make a soundtrack for my life.
52. Buy a new car.
53. Get a colon cleanse. It would just be too good of a story.
54. Complete another detox for 10 days.
55. Sing in every shower I take for a month.
56. Play WoW for an hour someday. i have to see what all the fuss is about.
57. Get a pretty ring, and wear it everyday for a month.
58. See the Aurora Borealis.
59. Take a multivitamin daily for a month.
60. Solve a Rubik's Cube.
61. Live to be 24.
62. Climb to the top of the Eiffel Tower, instead of paying the 5 Euros to take the elevator.
63. Change my hair drastically.
64. Read "Mein Kampf"
65. Drink no alcohol for a whole month.
66. Frame the various pieces of art i have put away.
67. Go to Las Vegas and actually have a good time. *i'm 0 for 3*
68. Get someone else to do the 101 Goals list.
69. Wake up right after the alarm goes off for a week.
70. Go and see an opera.
71. Buy a new cell phone.
72. Get a new tattoo.
73. Go laser tagging.
74. Go a day without speaking.
75. Start and finish Europe scrapbook from first trip.
76. Drink the 8 8 oz. glasses of water needed everyday for a month.
77. Visit my family in Missouri.
78. Ride on a train - not BART-
79. Re-learn how to fold paper cranes and hang 1000 of them from my ceiling.*tell me you remember that book*
80. Shoot a gun.
81. Get fingerprinted at District Office - something i was supposed to do forever ago.
82. Sponsor someone in a charity walk.
83. Spend a day in San Francisco alone.
84. Get a new lipstick color that suits me.
85. Go on a cruise.
86. Beautify my desk space at Armijo.
87. Plan my funeral.
88. Visit all of the States. i'm probably a little over halfway done, i'll have to consult my list.
89. Stretch daily.
90. Fix the purses that need fixen'. *sew handles/pockets, buff leather, etc.*
91. Go somewhere cool with my dad.
92. Identify 100 things that make me happy.
93. Clear out the garage, as most of the clutter belongs to me and my childhood.
94. Memorize five of Shakespeare's sonnets.
95. Get a 3.3 GPA.
96. Write a piece of fan mail.
97. Watch a live Cirque Du Soleil show.
98. Learn how to make Mama's spaghetti.
99. Build a fort out of chairs and sheets, spend an hour in it.
100. Complete one year of Project 365.
101. Donate $10 for each goal not reached.
Custom Countdowns & MySpace Layouts
Sunday, December 7, 2008
We're kissing without kissing.
Abstract Expressionism..is there anything that is more of a trip? i mean there are the obvious stars of genre, De Kooning and Pollock to name a couple. But i just stumbled upon my favorite. Francis Bacon. His paintings resemble nightmares out of the darkest of brains. He was born in 1909 and died in 1992, and lived in Europe..which tells you what horrors he witnessed in his lifetime, thus explaining his penchant for the darkness in his work. i consider myself a slightly over the top morbid person who delights in most everything pertaining to death, ghosts, and other monsters. i was raised this way by my mother who is the same herself. So it should come to no surprise that i LOVE Bacon's work. He did a study of a piece by Diego Velazquez, my second favorite Spanish painter..followed only by Francisco Goya, another lover of all things dark. He painted a bunch of different interpretations of Velazquez's "Portrait of Pope Innocent X". My favorite is of course the most popular of these different studies.
Diego Velazquez - Portrait of Pope Innocent X
Francis Bacon - Study after Velazquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X
Kind of amazing, yes?
Alright - back to water molecules with their polar covalent bonds..UGH!! i fucking hate Science.
Diego Velazquez - Portrait of Pope Innocent X
Francis Bacon - Study after Velazquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X
Kind of amazing, yes?
Alright - back to water molecules with their polar covalent bonds..UGH!! i fucking hate Science.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
California in December.
i was in Vacaville tonight. Drinking a bit, after i finished a long essay. Around two in the morning Jenelle grabbed my arm and dragged my semi-belligerent self outside through the side gate of her house. i shuffled through the thousand yellow leaves on the ground and stood in the middle of the street sipping my Corona. Then i noticed what she was wanting me to see. The fog. It was eeriely beautiful . . . as cliche as that sounds. You could barely see the house across the street. The streetlights set off this wonderful yellow glow. In the near distance you could hear the geese honking on the Vaca High football field. It was without a doubt, one of the most breathtaking experiences in my life. Jenelle and i stood in the middle of the street for what seemed an eternity, silent...just listening to the sounds of December in California. It made me so incredibly happy to be alive and where i'm at in my life. It's amazing to feel that way sometimes. It happens only occasionally.
But when it does, holy shit is it amazing.
______
So, you know that question that people always ask.
If you could host a dinner party with five people who were already dead, who would you invite?
Well, i know who i would invite.
Freddie Mercury
Oscar Wilde
Lucille Ball
Anne Frank
William Shakespeare
i'd be slightly worried that Freddie, Oscar, and Billy would engage in some freaky threesome though. But because it's MY dinner party, such things would be frowned upon and otherwise not allowed. That is of course, unless it would be okay for me to watch/partake in.
i don't know how or why i got to thinking about this nonsense. But i must admit that i took a few months to come to this conclusion. i ruled out quite a few people. Shuffled around the guest list. Switched people in, then out, then back in again. i feel that this would be a spectacular guest list. Hopefully when i die this can be made possible. i know some people may seem a bit strange, but i just love everything that came out of their brains and/or souls while they were alive. i feel like if i could take in their essence for only an hour or so it would truly be amazing experience.
______
i thought about this year the other day, and i realized that it was over. i regret nothing that happened. i fully believe that this is the first time that i can say that. This was for sure a year that i will never forget. Not because it was an exceptional time full of wonderous memories. But more so because this year i grew as a woman more than i ever have in the time span that i have been alive. i think i am grateful for 2008, it opened my eyes to the horrible things that can happen to people...the sometimes harsh reality and how to deal/live with it all. i have matured a lot. It took me losing people from my life, gaining people in my life, experiencing new things, and no longer experiencing things that i used to do frequently to know that i am in fact, a good person. i am happy with who i am as a 23 year old woman. This next year i know that things are only going to change to another extreme. Everything in my life could possibly change. We'll find out sometime in July. Just around when i get back from Europe. i hate it so much. i hate the prospect of failure. College is just so fucked up like that. i truly cannot believe that i have arrived at this point in my life where i could actually enter "adulthood". It's almost sickening. Eh. i'm gonna go spoon with my Chihuahua now.
But when it does, holy shit is it amazing.
______
So, you know that question that people always ask.
If you could host a dinner party with five people who were already dead, who would you invite?
Well, i know who i would invite.
Freddie Mercury
Oscar Wilde
Lucille Ball
Anne Frank
William Shakespeare
i'd be slightly worried that Freddie, Oscar, and Billy would engage in some freaky threesome though. But because it's MY dinner party, such things would be frowned upon and otherwise not allowed. That is of course, unless it would be okay for me to watch/partake in.
i don't know how or why i got to thinking about this nonsense. But i must admit that i took a few months to come to this conclusion. i ruled out quite a few people. Shuffled around the guest list. Switched people in, then out, then back in again. i feel that this would be a spectacular guest list. Hopefully when i die this can be made possible. i know some people may seem a bit strange, but i just love everything that came out of their brains and/or souls while they were alive. i feel like if i could take in their essence for only an hour or so it would truly be amazing experience.
______
i thought about this year the other day, and i realized that it was over. i regret nothing that happened. i fully believe that this is the first time that i can say that. This was for sure a year that i will never forget. Not because it was an exceptional time full of wonderous memories. But more so because this year i grew as a woman more than i ever have in the time span that i have been alive. i think i am grateful for 2008, it opened my eyes to the horrible things that can happen to people...the sometimes harsh reality and how to deal/live with it all. i have matured a lot. It took me losing people from my life, gaining people in my life, experiencing new things, and no longer experiencing things that i used to do frequently to know that i am in fact, a good person. i am happy with who i am as a 23 year old woman. This next year i know that things are only going to change to another extreme. Everything in my life could possibly change. We'll find out sometime in July. Just around when i get back from Europe. i hate it so much. i hate the prospect of failure. College is just so fucked up like that. i truly cannot believe that i have arrived at this point in my life where i could actually enter "adulthood". It's almost sickening. Eh. i'm gonna go spoon with my Chihuahua now.
Monday, December 1, 2008
i go through life like a karate kid
So i'm looking into the final details of my plane/train tickets to Europe. All i can say is that i am fucking stoked. May-June will be a blast, i'm going to most of the same places that i went to last time, with a few more thrown in there. London, Barcelona, Madrid, Rome, Florence, Venice, Paris, a shitload of a lot of places in Germany, and then Greece. i'm also lookin' into Switzerland and Austria..because - - well hell, there right in the middle of all of those damn countries.. it would be stupid to not hop off the train and check it out. Wasn't it in Vienna where Before Sunrise was set? Yeah, it could be worth it to check that out. i decided that this time i'm going to try and be a tourist more of the shit to see, rather than a tourist of the local bars/clubs. i'm gonna try real, real hard. Tickets are pretty reasonable right now *around a grand, nonstop*. There's something strange that i find myself thinking about when buying plane tickets for somwhere. You know how when you are on some site like expedia, and you enter in the destination and dates? There's a window that pops up with all the different options for you to choose from. i always think about which of those planes might crash. Like - - i'm lazy, so i always choose an afternoon flight over an early morning flight if the price is close. But as i pay for the afternoon flight i think about whether or not that one is destined to blow up and fall into the ocean in a molten pile of metal and human flesh. . . and if i should've sucked it up and picked the early mornign flight so that i can save my life. . . Can you tell i'm terrified of flying? i mean seriously, i am so afraid of flying it is DISGUSTING. i have to be completely trashed, and then even still i have to call my mom when i am getting ready to board the plane, in order to cry to her. Last time i flew to Europe on the ten hour flight i was schnockered on sleeping pills and red wine. i still couldn't manage to sleep (due in part to the old lady sleeping on my arm, the excellent movie choices, and the slight panic attack i was having). Whatever is the case i'm going to Europe this summer. . Here's praying that i don't come back this time.
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