"Well, this one is glowing green...kind of ominous...the other one is making a strange buzzing noise....god know what that buzzing could be...but glowing green lights!!!! No way man!"
Clearly you go with door #2, the one that's buzzing...only to be attacked by a swarm of giant hornets!! You of course die and have to start all over again. Dammit.
The point of all this blabber is because i recently met someone who looked like a creature i couldn't quite place. All too familiar and scary all at once, made me quite uncomfortable to say the least. Try as i might, i couldn't place what creature this person so closely resembled. Until today.
A Komodo Dragon.
Buh! i have a very distinct fear of the illusive Komodo Dragon, a foul beast who can grow up to eight feet long, can eat humans, and hails from the island of Komodo in Indonesia. They are fucking terrifying to even look at.
Don't know what they and/or don't believe me? Check out this brief clip. Here's a note: make sure your speakers are turned on. The music quite makes the clip all that much more menacing.
See what i mean? These fuckers are terrible. TERRIBLE!
i'm sure you're wondering as to how i became so scared of a creature that lives across the world. Well my friend, R.L. Stine taught me what a Komodo fucking Dragon was. i read one of his "Give Yourself Goosebumps" novels *yes, R.L. Stine writes fucking NOVELS* i believe it was the one called "Escape from the Carnival of Horrors". In this novel he had the option of going through some room and you end up in some kind of desert looking cage and see nothing. You hear nothing. You think "sweet, i'm safe" until you feel eyes upon you. Then a very large lizard things comes tearing ass from out of nowhere, you run...but not fast enough. you are eaten by a Komodo Dragon, and it's all your fault for choosing to go to page 44.
Fuck you Komodo Dragons. i will hunt you, until there are none left.
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